Rescued from a corrupted hard drive by: Colin F.
The author writes:
Translation of Major Hamm's phone call: "Yes, there's a lot of cheese being made. We're not going to have enough stores to stock it all, so we're going to liquidate. Would you like to order some? ... We have cheddar, mozzarella, Colby Jack, brie, sakura, bleu, Sardo, Rodoric, Friulano, Chesdale, Minas and cottage cheese. ... We don't appreciate your puns, sir."