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Episode ST.4: Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, part 1


The Wrath of Khan might be the best film, but The Voyage Home is easily the most fun to watch. It's the joyful exhalation after the wild dramatic ride of the last two films. So many great scenes and great lines.

And personally it's helped even more by the fact that much of it set in San Francisco, the city where I've spent more time than anywhere else except my home of Sydney, and which feels almost like a second home to me. (I was there, in fact, just a week ago as I type this.)

The oddest thing, which could definitely have been cut, is the bizarro time warp sequence. It uses some 3D computer graphics which were no doubt state-of-the-art and impressive at the time, but now it just looks dated and awful and surreal like a really poorly done James Bond opening title sequence.

But that's a quibble. For many people this is their favourite Star Trek film, and it's really not hard to see why. So sit back and enjoy the ride.


Captain's log, Stardate 8390.0. About to return to Earth to face the consequences of stealing Enterprise.
McCoy: In this Klingon rust bucket!
Scotty: Aye, but it has a plot hook cloaking device.
{Spock is standing on some rocks looking down at them}
Kirk: I've seen those rocks somewhere...
Amanda: How do you feel, Spock?
Spock: I do not understand the question, mother.
Amanda: You must get back in touch with your human side too.
Spock: Perhaps abandoning Saavik here on Vulcan will help.
{approaching Earth, in the Klingon ship}
Uhura: Admiral, a broadcast from the Federation President!
Federation President: An alien probe is vaporising Earth's oceans. Don't bother trying to save us. We're all doomed. Bye.
Kirk: Didn't we deal with that V'ger thing?
Spock: The probe's signal. It is whale song.
Kirk: But whales died out in the 21st century.
Spock: We could go back in time to get some.
McCoy: Now wait—
Kirk: Allons-y!
Caption: Trippy James Bond opening sequence time warp graphics:
Caption: The 1980s.
Radio: {song}
Uhura: Receiving whale song! Strange, it's coming from San Francisco.
McCoy: Does nobody think whales transmitting radio signals is strange?
Kirk: Bones, Scotty, Sulu: build a whale tank. Chekov, Uhura: find some uranium to recharge our dilithium. Spock, we'll get the whales. And some money.
{an antique store in San Francisco}
Spock: The glasses Dr McCoy gave to you?
Antique store owner: I'll give you $100 for them.
Kirk: Is that a lot?
Antique store owner: What are you, some sort of dumb ass?
Kirk: Double dumb ass on you!
{on a bus}
Ghetto blaster: {really loud music}
Kirk: Stop that damn noise!
{Punk gives him the finger}
SFX: nerve pinch!
Spock: You are using more... colourful language.
Kirk: Just blending in. Every damn person speaks that #$&@! way here, Spock.
{San Francisco street}
Chekov: We're looking for the nuclear wessels in Alameda.
Stranger: I think they're in Alameda.
Chekov: But where is Alameda?
Uhura: Sulu grew up here. Why didn't we just ask him?
{Cetacean Institute in Sausalito}
Gillian: Welcome to the Cetacean Institute! We have the only two humpback whales in captivity.
Kirk: Perfect, Spock!
Spock: Damn right.

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