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No. 1264:

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Quoted from an email originally sent to: Treehugger

The author writes:

There's a reason he avoids recruitment bureaus: the Crimean War draws near, and his girth alone could change history.

If he stood on the Plain of Balaclava, it would no longer be the Thin Red Line. And if he went along for the ride, it'd not really be the Charge of the Light Brigade.