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No. 90: Feels like we've bean here forever!

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Feels like we've bean here forever!

First | Previous | 2016-10-12 | Next | Latest

Strip by: Ian Boreham

caption: Meanwhile, in the η-Iceberg system of the Salad Nebula:
{The SSS Waldorf is in orbit around a planet that looks like an iceberg lettuce with tomato and spanish onion moons. The spaceship looks like it’s made of a salad spinner, a mayonnaise bottle and pepper grinders. Two crew members are talking.}
A: Why are we posted to this side dish of a system?
B: You’re still a fresh recruit. It happened before you joined the crew. After our alliance with the Sausagemen broke down, the captain accidentally got the ship in a spin in a battle with the Cerealeans off Vega, and lightly tossed away an easy victory.
A: Damn… I hate those carb-based lifeforms.
B: They shredded us!
B: His Crispness, the Caesar of our Saladean Empire, May He Never Wilt, called the captain to the Food Pyramid. Gave him a real dressing down. Said he had lost his crunch.
A: That would have really grated. I mean, the captain’s no liteweight.
B: Well, if you ask me, there was a kernel of truth to it. Let’s hope he gets a chance to turn over a new leaf.
A: Yeah, I hope we can get this rocket back to Cos Major in time for the celerybration season.

The author writes:

Ah, puns...the lowest form of humour of the lowest form of life in the galaxy. And vegetable-themed puns at that. Most illogical.

How will our heroes fare in their cress-ade against the Sausagemen and their new starchy allies? Can they turnip their defeat into vchicory? Will they squash their opposition and capture the Archbrioche, or will they be wursted? What was the sauce of the conflict? Will the narrator's puns become less and less intelligible? Tune in next leek to see them make a surprise artichoke on a squadron of baguettes and rye fighters.

Drawn in Krita and Inkscape.