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No. 797: Lifetime Word Count 10,159

First | Previous | 2018-11-19 | Latest

Lifetime Word Count 10,159

First | Previous | 2018-11-19 | Latest

Strip by: Sloublues

Narrator: Delkin, what are you writing for NaNoWriMo?
Delkin: {despondent} Oh, about three hundred words.
SFX: *ba-dum tish*
The NaNoWriMo Comic
Oliver: I'm writing the Great American Novel!
Narrator: Ambitious . . . but what's it about?
Oliver: I'm still not sure, but it's definitely Great and American!
Oliver: {under his breath} seriously I'm 30,000 words in and still have no idea where this is going send help
Holly: I'm writing a tale about a beautiful young woman who is imprisoned by a cruel monster who used to be a dashing prince, and then her innocent love returns him to humanity!
Narrator: Isn't that Beauty and the Beast?
Holly: Yep! But in my version he looks like Orlando Bloom!
Narrator: As the beast or as a hu--
Holly: BOTH!
Ambrose: My novel is a classic tragedy! A handsome mad scientist sets out to prove his detractors wrong by conquering the world with his atomic-powered polymer rocket boots and polymer-powered atomic ray gun! The twist is that it never goes tragically awry, and he defeats the hero and lives victoriously ever after!
Narrator: Polymers? I thought you were working on mind-controlled koalas.
Ambrose: It turns out that the dropbear thing is just a myth.
Steve: I'm writing a fantasy epic where I'm the hero and everyone loves me and nobody tries to kill me!
Narrator: Emphasis on the "fantasy", I see.
Samantha: My main character is an empowered businesswoman who rises to the top of her industry through shrewd dealings and knowing what the customer wants, but not without facing poignant loss in her private life.
Narrator: Sounds good.
Samantha: And she can totally whip your precious Captain Jack Greenleaf any day!
Holly: {offscreen} His name is Aiden and nuh-uh!
Meridien: I reject the artificial impositions of "months" and "thousands". Cold, soulless math has no place in true art.
Narrator: It's going that badly, huh?
Meridien: I wrote a couple of paragraphs about a cute puppy and spent the rest of the day watching dog videos.
Narrator: Seriously, Delkin, what are you writing?
Delkin: Oh, I'm pre-writing blurbs to sell to the others when they self-publish their novels.
Narrator: I guess that's one way to benefit from National Novel Writing Month.
Delkin: But maybe I should write a drabble so I can be credited as critic and author.

The author writes:

This counts toward my word count, right?

Please?

Non-Steve art by David Birch.