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No. 339: Time for Weird

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Time for Weird

First | Previous | 2019-09-26 | Next | Latest

Strip by: Nyperold

{An elderly woman sits in a room, talking on a battery-operated rotary phone. A sign nearby identifies her only as the Time Lady; funny, she doesn't look Gallifreyan}
Time Lady: ...At the tone the time will be...
Pig: Time Lady! It's me, Pig, again! I'm just calling to see how you're doing.
{Pig, using the latest in couch cushions, listens to her response}
Time Lady: Ohh, a bit lonely... as usual, these days.
Pig: I figured. So I thought I'd try to help.
{The Time Lady is housed in a wooden house on a crooked pole with a sign displaying her occupation on it, set in a desert with cacti and the occasional large glass of unidentified beverage. The mountains, in addition to providing the rain shadow that makes this a desert, obscure all but the top of a brunette's head; since we don't know which direction we're facing -- and since Pig interrupted the Time Lady -- it's unclear if it is brunrise or brunset}
Time Lady: Help how?
Pig: Well, we have this thing called the internet now where we all connect, and I told everyone you still exist.
{The Time Lady is skeptical of this kind of help, so skeptical, in fact, that her entire appearance changes as she speaks over the coffee cup}
Time Lady: And what did this internet say?
{Pig's voice returns over the Time Lady's earpiece}
Pig: I have no idea what you are saying because I'm wearing noise-canceling headphones.
{As the conversation continues, Pig's decorative Jr. takes interest.}
Time Lady: Oh, wonderful!
Pig: Clumsy and ham-handed and this is only going to get worse
{Enough about my editing}
Time Lady: WHAT? WHAT?
{Pressed on the subject, Pig the squirrel yells out another of the internet's complaints}
Pig: THAT YOU CAN'T EVEN TELL TIME!!
{Shocked, Time Lady lies on the floor}
Time Lady: I'm going back to 1988 now.
Pig: I forgot to mention the internet's downside.

The author writes:

Original Pearls Before Swine strip: 2019-09-15.

Original Garfield strip: 2019-09-15.

Original Dustin strip: 2019-09-15.

Original Dilbert strip: 2019-09-15.

Original Betty strip: 2019-09-15.

Original Wizard of Id strip: 2019-09-15.