Thy daughter-in-law remindeth me of the lewdsters of Bosdeen-on-Spey, whom doth bite their own jester’s cap.

Thy humour is so sluggish, even a scabrous doppelganger-barf wouldst not stop it.

I would rather be delivered by a muddy-mottled mumpsimus than behold thy genius for another minute.

Art thou a depraved hugger-mugger, or merely observed by one?